Prince Harry mocks Prince William’s ‘alarming’ balding

Prince Harry on the cover of his 2023 memoir Spare

Prince Harry dishes on his older brother Prince William’s hair loss in his new tell-all palace memoir ‘Spare.’

Maybe chalk it up to the hairless pot calling the royal tea kettle bald.

The semi-exiled Prince Harry is still seeking privacy on yet another whirlwind publicity tour.

This time he’s pimping his new tell-all memoir ‘Spare’ which makes a special point of mentioning Prince William going bald at such a young age.

The rival royals are only two years apart but the elder Prince William got hit with hair loss quicker than the newly hairless Harry.

Harry recounts his initial reaction to his balding brother:

“I looked at Willy, really looked at him, maybe for the first time since we were boys. I took it all in: his familiar scowl, which had always been his default in dealings with me, his alarming baldness, more advanced than my own; his famous resemblance to Mummy, which was fading with time.”

Prince Harry, Spare

Why Prince Harry is mocking Prince William’s balding

Let’s translate Harry’s hair-rasing quote.

Harry’s handsome older brother Prince William famously flirted with Britney Spears and once adorned the cover of every teen magazine on earth.

Meanwhile, Harry’s nonstop dishing of family dirt has taken him from war hero to palace persona non grata.

Now, Harry is getting even, by intimating William no longer resembles their famously beautiful mother, Princess Diana. Oh, and he’s bald too — way balder than me!

Harry says this fraternal feud came to a head with a royal rumble in 2019. He accuses Prince William of physically attacking him while the two were in London.

“He set down the water, called me another name, then came at me. It all happened so fast. So very fast. He grabbed me by the collar, ripping my necklace, and he knocked me to the floor. I landed on the dog’s bowl, which cracked under my back, the pieces cutting into me. I lay there for a moment, dazed, then got to my feet and told him to get out.”

Prince Harry, Spare

The real lesson of Prince Harry’s hair-loss hypocrisy

Wherever you come down on this feud, there are some key takeaways about male pattern hair loss.

Prince Harry was shocked to see William go Norwood 7 level bald in his 20s, only to be visibly bald himself in his 30s.

Many believe hair loss comes from the mother’s side, which in this case, would mean Princess Diana’s father is to blame.

However, this isn’t strictly true. Both sides of the family influence male pattern baldness, according to research.

To wit: Diana’s father John Spencer had a visibly receding hairline in late middle age, but his pattern is different than Harry’s.

Unfortunately for these follicularly challenged fellows, their own father, king Charles, also has a receding crown.

The hair-shedding millennial heirs definitely inherited more than just titles.

What could Prince Harry do about his hair loss?

Prince Harry’s reaction to his brother’s balding was to put it in his memoir. Given the family genetics, a better strategy would have been an aggressive treatment regimen.

The quickest remedy is 5% minoxidil. Kirkland brand is a little cheaper than Rogaine, and the foam version creates an instantly thicker look.

Don’t use the serum version dispensed in those droppers. It’s cheaper, but it’s greasy and will make your hair look wet and visibly thinner. Losing confidence could lead to giving up.

Since Harry’s hair loss is inherited, he should also address the male hormone that attacks hair follicles. A daily DHT-blocking pill is the easiest way, but there are now topical formulas with a lower chance of sexual side effects. This one is the most aggressive.

Hair loss supplements have also been shown to work. They can be a little pricy but that’s certainly not an issue for a royal.

Nutrafol is one of the major brands this meta study revealed to be effective.

A daily shampoo with a DHT blocker is also essential, and extremely affordable.

Finally, derma rolling has been shown to stimulate hair growth too. The studies show you need a needle length of at least 1.5 mm. This stings a little but not only does it revive follicles, it also makes your other treatments more effective.

Finally, with any hair loss protocol, the last ingredient is patience.

Much like royal resentments, hair loss doesn’t happen overnight. Hair growth is the same way.